The Real me VS the PMS me: Something to talk about

I woke up yesterday morning feeling good and upbeat about everything without ANY nightmares of troubled times and the fairy tale world where I love my job. Until I realized it’s that freakin time of the month when you feel as though your uterus is doing a hop skip jump ballerina and the right side of your back feels like it’s at war with the left side of your back.

High level of mood swings. Major.

I tend to think iam Queen.

My red light is up. I warned you: do not play with fire (invisibly on my forehead). No conceivable way to change that.

And also yeah. Random topics not in order of any sort would be merely brought up.

For some reason, I wrote about death and don’t feel like posting it. But I’ll cut and paste only snippets of the draft where people won’t think I need help.

Another thought that is stirring me up again. Death.

My grand uncle died on the 6th of June 1976 in a plane crash over Sembulan village, which is situated in Kota Kinabalu district. The plane which was on its way to KK airport from Labuan, crashed about 30 minutes after taking off. Till this date, no formal report appears to have been made. (Wikipedia) He was the pilot, Captain Gandhinathan. Can’t seem to find anything on him as it says no formal report made. He was like 33 years old I think. Apparently, he was nearly vanished entirely, and people could only recognise him from the shape of his ears.

Gosh this is sad.

I assume iam afraid of death or something like it.


People are just dropping dead every now and then, and to make things worse, young ones like me. Heart attacks, car accidents, strange deceases and the like. Some of them hale and hearty. So why cant it happen to people like you and me?

So just how do we know that we’re going to die? Do we see a light? According to Hindu priests, about 3 days before dying, you’d feel and recognise the aura of death and a few minutes before your soul leaves the body you’ll see and hear the gods dancing above you. (Nadarajan) .They say this.

Plane crash is the most terrifying of them all. Being the pilot is perhaps worst. Caught up with all the tension that your plane is going down, you being the pilot trying hard to maneuver it helplessly. One can only imagine.


Life is just way too short.

Too short to be upset, holding grudges, being difficult and all that crap.

For the moment, I would like to make peace with people I don’t like. The possibility of this happening is 0 though. I usually have very valid reasons on why I say ‘I don’t like you’. It’s simple really. It’s because you leave very little room for choice and discretion.

Whats new:-

Goal:
On a diet in an attempt to improve my image towards reaching my target of looking something close to Charlize Theron.

Progress:
Still looking like Ursula the sea witch with nice large hips, one pack tummy and love handles the size of South Africa, worshipping gurdles so I don’t expand all my work clothes.

Goal:
With a leap of faith, iam throwing the dice by leaving this coming October to be a successful accountant that would shudder the city of Victoria and to become a millionaire by 35.

Progress:
Sipping my coffee every morning and building castles in the air. Still looking at my audit files and secretly wishing everyone at my office was dead. And telling all my aussie mates cya in October matey!!(Without a job or a place to stay)- The way forward. According to Oscar Wilde(Irish Novelist) and wise man, an ambition is a failure’s last resort.

Sigh.Nalina Nalina.Even I do not know what to do with me.

Some things never go out of fashion: My black stockings